Yes Randy, I have read your story. Well, it means we must have crossed paths sometime in those months. Is there a private messagebox where I can write you some details?
not sure yet
JoinedPosts by not sure yet
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72
ANOTHER GILEAD STUDENT
by not sure yet ini've been reading this forum a for some time now.
since i find myself on a crossroad i decided to start participating.
i was at gilead in 1980 and remember standing in de elevator alone with ray franz, how just gave us a lecture.
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72
ANOTHER GILEAD STUDENT
by not sure yet ini've been reading this forum a for some time now.
since i find myself on a crossroad i decided to start participating.
i was at gilead in 1980 and remember standing in de elevator alone with ray franz, how just gave us a lecture.
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not sure yet
When I stepped down as a missionary, but still in good standing, I let a lot of people down. That was when they could see I doubted the rule of only marrying in the lord, although i did finally obey that rule. I knew for sure they considered me weak at least, because of how they related to me after that. For them (those bystanders) though, it is very painful to see a person who one has admired, take difficult decisions that downsizes that image. Eversince I tried to proof them (in my subconscience) that my non-missionary life is worthwhile and perfect all the time. It's like the brothers (people) are watching over my shoulders all the time, instead of Jehovah himself of whom I don´t feel afraid or negatively intimidated in any manner.
That strange fear of men (insiders social control) put a tremendeous pressure on myself and ofcourse through me on my children and husband....who have nothing whatsoever to do with my former life-decisions, nor do they deserve to have to make me look good in the eyes of the brothers. But they do anyway, you see, because they love me and they understand the complexity of it all. Because they are connected somehow to the truth, I cannot discuss doubts with them, nor did I ever discuss doubts with the elders, because I know their answers.
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72
ANOTHER GILEAD STUDENT
by not sure yet ini've been reading this forum a for some time now.
since i find myself on a crossroad i decided to start participating.
i was at gilead in 1980 and remember standing in de elevator alone with ray franz, how just gave us a lecture.
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not sure yet
AllTimeJeff, yes we certainly are two different generations of Gilead. You were in Patterson I think. Glass and Redford were very fine teachers and both had their protegees, you're right. Redford did not like his life in the third-world when he was a missionary, and he was bold about that. My life has been going upward many years already...because every crisis makes a person stronger and moving ahead.
Cyberjesus, I have only read some parts of the book online. I don't want to be identified because it would not add any extra value to my story I'm sure. If there's anybody who knows me, well that means we're both on this board for some reason. Thank you for your friendly and advicing words.
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72
ANOTHER GILEAD STUDENT
by not sure yet ini've been reading this forum a for some time now.
since i find myself on a crossroad i decided to start participating.
i was at gilead in 1980 and remember standing in de elevator alone with ray franz, how just gave us a lecture.
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not sure yet
I wrote this before and want to make a comment to make it clear what I meant
....'When my children were counseled on the dangers of higher education, I nevertheless send my children off to study, but on a special mission: 'proof them (the brothers)wrong'. They are close to become a medical doctor, psychologist, health systems expert and orthodontist. Recently I travelled to visit with them and released them from that mission. Enough of proofing them wrong, it's a no-good motivation for any proyect in life'.
I mean with that: the brothers say high eduaction and being an active JW is impossible. I told my children: proof them wrong. Be a good witness ánd have a higher education. That is the pressure I wanted to take away from them recently.
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72
ANOTHER GILEAD STUDENT
by not sure yet ini've been reading this forum a for some time now.
since i find myself on a crossroad i decided to start participating.
i was at gilead in 1980 and remember standing in de elevator alone with ray franz, how just gave us a lecture.
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-
not sure yet
Daniel, thank you for telling your story and love the part about that nothing of this whole matter destroyed your marriage.
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72
ANOTHER GILEAD STUDENT
by not sure yet ini've been reading this forum a for some time now.
since i find myself on a crossroad i decided to start participating.
i was at gilead in 1980 and remember standing in de elevator alone with ray franz, how just gave us a lecture.
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not sure yet
jwfacts, I hope being identified by someone on this board will not get me into trouble....but anyway, I can not tell my story without giving myself away to the ones that can figure out who I am. I just want to take little steps into this new territory witout hurting my family or taking the good memories away from my children, who were raised by me in the truth. I want them to keeps cherishing the good part of it...more so now they are free and unattached to the congregation...besides memorials and special talks. But when they are home with me, they still ask me: 'come mommy....say a pray with me ........' They keep the paradise hope and Jehovah as their God deep down in their hearts......I'm sure of that, but in a non compromising way........But If I leave, I've been their hero-missionary-mom, their dream is gone too. That is my dilema......Yes my children are taking their chances in the world of education.....and will use them wisely...I'm sure. Its worth all the effort and money we can get our hands on....and they were given scholarships in my home country also. I live in this town people know me as a missionary since the start...even after I just started a normal familylife.....even for the world I have to keep my good standing, I think sometimes....
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72
ANOTHER GILEAD STUDENT
by not sure yet ini've been reading this forum a for some time now.
since i find myself on a crossroad i decided to start participating.
i was at gilead in 1980 and remember standing in de elevator alone with ray franz, how just gave us a lecture.
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not sure yet
Thanks very much for your support. Yes i have gone through almost all of the exBethelites and Gileadgraduates stories. It is hard for me to tell my story because I'm still in good standing and have children and a (high educated)husband (who became a witness to marry me). My children are not baptized and are all living and studying university in my (first-world) homecountry, while I (with my husband) live still in my missionary assignment. When my children were counseled on the dangers of higher education, I nevertheless send my children off to study, but on a special mission: 'proof them (the brothers)wrong'. They are close to become a medical doctor, psychologist, health systems expert and orthodontist. Recently I travelled to visit with them and released them from that mission. Enough of proofing them wrong, it's a no-good motivation for any proyect in life. I was the youngest ever appointed regular pioneer in my country, then the youngest ever appointed special pioneer and then, yes, the youngest ever graduated from Gilead. I served four years as a missionary, it were good times, as were my pioneer years back home. I would have loved to live on the dream and never wake up. Gilead made that impossible and taking back steps in service makes the rest of life a constant guilt-trip.
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72
ANOTHER GILEAD STUDENT
by not sure yet ini've been reading this forum a for some time now.
since i find myself on a crossroad i decided to start participating.
i was at gilead in 1980 and remember standing in de elevator alone with ray franz, how just gave us a lecture.
-
-
not sure yet
A short time after I graduated, another friend of my homecountry went through Gilead and said to me: It was like coming into the truth all over again. That struck me like lightning, because for me it was a very non-spiritual experience. I hoped to learn some hebrew and greek and about the origen of the bible...because I would maybe have to defend christianity up against a foreign 'pagan' religion. But none of that happened. I went to my assignment trying to keep the 'true-believers-feeling' I had in my homecountry and during my childhood. Gilead took away the magic my belief had up to that moment. Eversince (30 years) I have been fighting to keep that magic alive somehow.
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72
ANOTHER GILEAD STUDENT
by not sure yet ini've been reading this forum a for some time now.
since i find myself on a crossroad i decided to start participating.
i was at gilead in 1980 and remember standing in de elevator alone with ray franz, how just gave us a lecture.
-
-
not sure yet
Was your class the one that did the Wiz at graduation? I worked on Gilead when it moved to 12th floor of 30 building?
I don't know what you mean by Wiz....but yes, during our class we moved to the upper floor of the 30th building...(with a beautiful view), and a terrace we could access during coffeebreak.
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72
ANOTHER GILEAD STUDENT
by not sure yet ini've been reading this forum a for some time now.
since i find myself on a crossroad i decided to start participating.
i was at gilead in 1980 and remember standing in de elevator alone with ray franz, how just gave us a lecture.
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not sure yet
Here a part of my story:
Ik hope this mail finds you well. I just want to let you know that I was a Gilead student, graduated in 1980. You gave us one of yours last lectures. After class you left (you had a windjacket on) and I was standing in the elevator with you. You were silent and than after a short smalltalk you said out of the blue: 'I wish I had never left missionary service'.
My annointed aunt (and concentrationcamp survivor) went to my Gilead graduation. She was shocked with Fred's very bloodthirsty talk. She asked me to arrange a meeting with one of you (GB) to share some insight she tought you would love to hear. She had put in into writing in english to hand it over. She had (has) al kinds of beautiful insight about Gods people and their role throughout history. Brother Glass arranged a meeting for her, but they send a officeclerk to receive us in a small room ..... he looked very bored, listened and received the papers of my aunt. She never received any answer. I was very shocked by that and sincerely thought she must be apostate then...and I wrote her a terrible letter from my missionary assignment to tell her that I was loyal to the Brooklyn brothers and she was a bad influence for me. I can never ever forgive myself for that. She has forgiven me, ofcourse.That is when I knew the Faithful Slave did not exist in the eyes of the Brooklyn beholders.